i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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