i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Randomize
