just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
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