Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
