Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
Randomize
