We need to rekindle our bromance
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
