Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
