My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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