Need sex. Gaining weight.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
