In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Randomize
