..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize