As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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