Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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