yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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