Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I need water and some morals
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize