do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
