: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
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