just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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