just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize