he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
