I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Did we literally take a cab across the street
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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