you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
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