I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
