I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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