WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize