haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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