I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
We were destined to go to rehab together
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Randomize
