The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
The cashier looked at my basket, looked at me and said "That's a lot of wine." I looked at her and said "Mother in law." She nodded approvingly.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
