her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
