she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I just found puke in my bra..
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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