To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
We just shotgunned beers for America
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
