i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
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