he told me I talked like a deaf person
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize
