Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
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