I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
