you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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