allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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