Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
