I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Randomize
