He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
