i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
