Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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