As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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