Already got asked if we're dating
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Randomize
