if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
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