The best revenge is premature balding
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
