3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
Randomize
