Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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