If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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