Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Randomize
